Well I went to the doctor because of these blasted panic/anxiety attacks I've been having that have been hindering me in many areas of my life and after a brief exchange he reccomended 2.5mg of Zyprexa 5pm daily to ward the attacks off. It's so damn hot lately. I just wish it was Winter again. The doctor also told me that the Risperdone Consta injections I have been getting every two weeks for the past 8 months cause sexual dysfunction. I kinda had an idea something was going on but this. Combine that with the Lithium and Epilum I'm on and I am one fucked up person. If it actually did more than just stabilizing me and keeping the mania at bay I would be happy but that is all it does at the bare minimum. I don't have mania but my life is pretty damn sucky. I'm overweight now after a shitty 8 months back on the tablets. But the worst thing is I am stuck in the situation and can't seem to get out of it any way.
Anytime I try to go out and party a debilitating anxiety attack ends my night. I went to the airport the other night to pick up my brother and anxiety came on board and boy was it sucky. I was pacing all over the airport and the worst part of it was that my brother's plane was delayed by 2 and a half hours. So extra pacing. Lucky I didn't have to drive the 2 hour trip home because I'm sure it wouldn't have ended pretty.
I know my problems aren't much compared to those in third world countries and such but you are who you are and that is all you know so you shouldn't really have to make apologies for it. We are all our own reality. If anybody else out there who has Bipolar/Manic Depression also has anxiety/panic attacks (I'm not really sure what the official term for my particular strand is) please comment as I'm wondering if I'm not the only one.
Happy Christmas
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